* Today's post is longer because this is a rich topic. I recommend reading through it before jumping in*
Make sure to celebrate with yesterday's prompt before jumping into today's! Today we are going to meet some of our fears. We are going to introduce ourselves, acknowledge and name a few of them. I will walk you through every step. I, and the 60+ from around the world, are stepping in right here with you. I know it's easy to make excuses not to 'face' our fears, but those are our fears/shame not wanting light to be shined on them. Today, we are shining the light together! Let's go!
One of the major themes of the Jewish holiday of Passover is moving from being enslaved to becoming free. Yes, one of the traditions is telling the story of the Exodus of the Jewish people leaving Egypt and becoming free. But there is another aspect for, every person, every year, to feel as if they were leaving Egypt. But, how can do we that? For me, I think about leaving Egypt as a metaphor for leaving what I am enslaved to. I ask myself what I am enslaved to, what fears are dictating my choices, and how I can become free from them. The first step is naming them and building an awareness so I can catch those fears in real time dictating choices I am making everyday.
Today, we are going to be naming and owning our relationship with two fears we have. I know we have all have tons, but for today, we are going to focus on two. I want to control my life and my choices but what I have found is my fears actually have the control, not me. This is an opportunity to recognize how two fears in your life dictate choices you make. Today we are taking the first step. The key is that we cannot 'conquer' our fears by ignoring them or jumping over them, we need to move through them. It requires effort and ultimately is the most freeing experience. You take back your ownership of choices you are making everyday- we're not going all the way today, we are starting with the beginning.
I want to share an example with you from my own life. This is not what we are going to be doing for today's reflection prompt, but I want to share with you a tool I have used to be in relationship with my fears.
One of my biggest fears is rejection of others. It has dictated so many choices I have made. Until my coach pointed it out to me, this fear was in my blindspot, I did not realize how much it affects and controlled me. I want to share a note I wrote to my fear. A note I wrote from love and compassion.
You might think that writing a note to my fear from a place of gratitude is the antithesis of what we should be doing but stay with me! I focused on thanking my fear for being resilient and continuously showing up in my life, rather than resenting it, because resentment makes the shame and fear grow through my judgement of that fear.
This is a letter I wrote to my fear on 03/11/18 about my fear of rejection of others.
"Thank you for showing up, you have shown me how powerful people are and how tender and beautiful our souls are- and in that you have given me the power back with fuller force to show up with my authentic heart to be seen and received. It's only when I hold back from my goodness and sharing my authentic self, that people won't receive me, because that's not me! Thank you for reminding me how important it is for me to share vulnerably and reminding me the sacredness of souls and the power of sharing our souls, its a generous action."
Now, in relationship with this fear and validating it, I am moving through it.
Experience Day 5: A Step Toward Your Freedom
Post-its in hand- check!
Designated spot for your storyboard- check! Don't stop playing! Are you smiling?
There is no right or wrong and this is part of our storyboard brainstorm so these answers can always change, but for this moment, let's take a step forward!
Some examples of fears/shame: Fear of heights, dogs, unworthiness, hunger, being unloved, your boss, birds , rejection, darkness, the unknown, loneliness, rollercoasters, bees, claustrophobia, abandonment, flying...
1. Take 4 post-its and write #5 and Freedom on a corner of each post it.
2. On post it #1 identify a fear that has been with you, for years-it has shown up overtime!
3. On post it #2 identify a fear that has affected you recently
4. On post-its #3 and #4, we are going to take a minute to actualize and step into the reality where these fears are not in your life. Answer the following prompt in a few words or a sentence.... "if x fear is not in my life anymore, I would feel/be able to do/my life would look like this...
Add these powerful post-its to your storyboard and let's celebrate taking the time to rock this out! See you tomorrow for Day 6.
with gratitude,
N